Couples who come to counselling often say they were reluctant about the idea at first, but once they got started, it turned out to be a relief. Things that had felt overwhelming became more manageable. Taking the initiative seemed to make things less scary, more possible, and more hopeful.
Here are some things that couple counselling might have to offer:
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Someone even-handed to help you both get a fair hearing.
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Someone to manage the heat in your conversation, helping you keep civil and constructive.
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Trained observation and feedback to help you recognise and understand your own contribution to the state of the relationship.
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Ideas based on experience about what might make a difference.
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Information, perspectives and questions you might not have considered.
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Knowledge and experience about affairs, sex, parenting, anger, criticism, boredom, lack of time, arguing and many other issues that often challenge relationships.
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Someone who will really listen to both of you, and help you to both really listen to each other.
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Clarity about what each of you feels and thinks and wants.
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Help to recreate goodwill and romance.
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Reassurance that you are not the only couple with issues to sort out.
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Help to say difficult things to each other.
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Help to start mending things when one of you feels deeply hurt or betrayed.
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Help to separate if that's what you find you need to do.
Whether you want to start off well or fear your relationship is on the verge of ending couple counselling has the potential to increase your understanding and enjoyment of your relationship.
Our counsellors are trained professionals. We employ a diverse group of people so you have a high chance of finding a counsellor you feel comfortable with and who has the skills and experience you want.
To find out more about counselling, have a look at What happens in that counselling room, or talk to the administrator at your local Relationships Aotearoa office.
You can find the address for your local office in Contact Us. If you're interested in making an appointment, your local administrator will help match you with a counsellor and book in a time for you.
Find out about the cost of the service and the subsidies we have available at What does counselling cost?